I was still very young then. I wanted everything to be picture perfect, like the ones you read in romantic novels. But it didn't end up that way and I knew way before it all ended that it wasn't going to last. How did I know? I won't be able to answer that question without first, telling you a bit more about myself.
I'm the eldest child. I was taught to excel in most everything I do. I was trained and honed to succeed in something someday. When he became my boyfriend, I admit I was head over heels for some time. I couldn't understand why a senior would want to go out with a freshie. I still felt awkward about my shape. I was in the stage where I wasn't a child anymore but I wasn't woman enough yet while he, he was already learned then. I looked up to him. I thought he was really cool for knowing a lot of things. He was even cooler because he could always find something wrong about anything. I felt insuficient being with him. I couldn't cope with all his ideas and ideals. But that wasn't how I knew he wasn't the one.
One day, my friends (including him) decided for no apparent reason to take the civil service exam. Someone proposed that we all contributed a certain amount and whoever gets the highest score will get all the money. Being stingy, I refused to take part in the bet and the bet didn't push through.
When the scores came out, I got the highest score. I immediately felt like a loser for I was going to win 7 times more than my "investment" had I joined the bet. What he did was he took my score sheet, looked at it and while laughing tore a bit of it. That was the Aha! moment. That was the moment of truth. He can't possibly Mr. Right if he can't be happy for my successes. He can't be Mr. Right if he can't allow me to have the spotlight every once in a while. He can't be Mr. Right if he doesn't feel I deserve some small victories.
A little over a decade after, I found out he had gotten married. I didn't feel any sadness whatsoever. I hoped that he had found happiness in someone who complements him. Then I found out he hasn't changed much. I was told to thank my stars I didn't end up with him for he was making his wife's life miserable. Upon finding out about that I felt validated and I did pray to thank God I had that Aha! moment that day.
So girls, actually, this applies to boys too. If you are in a relationship that doesn't support, nurture or just tolerate your dreams, you are in the wrong relationship. We only go through life as we have it now, once. It simply is foolish to waste it by spending it with someone you don't deserve so get out of that relationship. There is always a choice. You just have to desire to make a difference in your life.
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